Sex is an important subject for most couples. No matter the length of time you have been together, it is often one of the things that can make you feel closest to one another.

Like so much else in our lives, sometimes that gets lost. It's natural and inevitable that at some point, that passion and spark that once grounded us seems like a distant memory. And it can be frustrating - in more ways than one, when you feel as if you are not connecting to each other in such an intimate way anymore.

Even though you may feel as if that spark is forever dimmed, it doesn't have to stay like this. It may be surprising to hear, but there are plenty of ways to bring back that passion and energy to your relationship through ways other than sex. Here is how you can spice up your sex life with your partner.

1. Break The Routine

Everyone gets into a routine within their relationship. As time moves forward, it's common that most couples will fall into this cycle of monotony. It isn't anyone in particular's fault, after all, routines are comforting and help us to not feel as stressed.

You are likely not in the same routine now as you were when you first began dating. However, there is nothing wrong with trying to freshen things up a bit! It's surprising, but just getting out of the normal routine of things can immensely help to improve your sex lives. If you haven't been on a date in awhile or out to dinner, make plans to go. It might be trial and error to find something that works, but by the end of the night, you should be seeing some sparks flying again.

2.Know What The Other Person Needs

Open and honest communication in a relationship is important, regardless of the subject matter. It's no different for your sex lives.

Maybe your needs have changed over time and you haven't expressed this. Or, maybe you never really gave much thought about what your needs are or what can get you in the mood. You may feel shy about bringing these subjects up - but if you can't be honest with your partner about what you need, then you can't expect them to know.

And do the same for them, as well. It's ok to be vulnerable with one another and what you desire.

3. Don't Be Afraid To Touch One Another

Not just talking about in bed - well, there too, obviously!

But, if you aren't physically touching periodically throughout the day - holding hands, a quick hug or massage, etc. then you can't expect to be in the mood to be physical with them later! It's not just the big ways that can help you feel closer to your partner. The small moments of little touches here and there can help you feel more intimate and close to one another.

Getting in the mood sometimes means going back to the basics. And, even on the nights where sex just isn't in the cards - physical touch can still bring you closer together emotionally.

4. Feeling Disconnected Sexually? Be Honest About That, Too

If you are feeling like things are too stagnant, there might be a chance that your partner does, too. But, how will either of you ever know that if you don't talk about it? Being honest when things get too stale can help you both begin to realize where some areas could need to be improved in your lives.

These are just a few small ways that you can start to spice your sex life up again. If you are interested in learning more about how sex therapy can help you, contact me so we can get your relationship back on track.